


my baby, my baby

by MinRosie



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Artistic Liberties, Character Death, Child Abandonment, Child Soldiers, Don't Examine This Too Closely, Fuck C!Phil me and my homies hate him, Gen, I'm in pain guys, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Pain, Regret, Spoilers for Tommy's 3/1 Stream
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-02
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-14 10:48:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29790798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MinRosie/pseuds/MinRosie
Summary: Wilbur remembers, watches, and regrets
Relationships: Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit
Comments: 52
Kudos: 913





	my baby, my baby

**Author's Note:**

> I watched the stream and sobbed,,, I wrote this in a fit of pain. I'm sure nothing really makes sense and I took many creative liberties but like,,,, :(((((((((
> 
> Friendship ended with SBI, Dadbur is my only friend now.
> 
> References to: Mitski's Loosing Dogs to add more pain lol

It first started before Wilbur was sixteen, almost an adult but still a child. When their father had first started leaving and Technoblade first started adventuring. It was before he realized they’d stay together and before everything started hurting, before the Dream SMP and before L’manburg. Tommy was only eight when their father stopped coming home when he realized that Phil wouldn’t be coming back. 

When he realized it was just going to be him and Tommy against the world.

He could remember standing in the middle of the living room that night, tightly wrapped in the silence of their house. He used to always hear something, snoring coming from Phil’s room or Technoblade shuffling around on nights where his insomnia hit hardest. He never heard Tommy, despite being loud when awake his little brother was a quiet sleeper. Now all he could hear was the howling wind outside and the groaning of zombies left out in the snow. Wilbur had broken then, lungs convulsing in his chest, as he choked down sobs.

_ Phil left and he wasn’t coming back _

Phil had abandoned him, abandoned  _ them _ . Wilbur could understand leaving him alone, he was sixteen, he was old enough to adventure. What hurt was that Phil had abandoned  _ Tommy _ , his little brother barely eight and didn’t look back. He didn’t care that Tommy would look up at him with admiring eyes and ask when it would be his turn to go adventuring with his dad, he didn’t care that he’d promised Tommy souvenirs when he came back, he didn’t care about  _ Tommy. _

Wilbur had made his way up the stairs of the cottage, past the burnt out fireplace, past the empty bedrooms and the half stocked kitchen and found himself outside Tommy’s room. Tommy was snuggled down into his blanket, blissfully unaware of what had happened. Wilbur stifled his sobs as he pushed the blanket back and pulled Tommy close.

“Wilby? W’as wrong.” His baby brother had mumbled, still half asleep. Tommy hadn’t looked up at all only snuggled closer into Wilbur’s hug and pulled his blanket close.

“It’s nothing… It’s nothing.” Wilbur lied, even as his voice cracked and his tears didn’t stop. They  _ couldn’t _ stop. 

“Mmm… Night?” Wilbur nodded holding Tommy tightly. His baby,  _ his poor baby. _

_ Tommy had left first deciding he wanted to follow after Technoblade. It didn’t hurt,  _ **_it didn’t_ ** _. So Wilbur left too and made a family of his own. One that didn’t last, one that never ever seemed to ever last. _

Then came the Dream SMP and L’manburg. His baby was back and he had his little Champion as well, the two of them grew and grew. Their little nation prospered and his little family had grown bigger, they were happy and they were  _ safe _ . Then the election happened, and he snapped.

Wilbur honestly should have expected it and it shouldn’t have hurt so badly. He should have expected L’manburg not to last, its beauty and it’s purpose being dirtied and twisted by greedy hands. He should’ve expected for the country to turn him out, to turn  _ them  _ out. After all they’d done for it after all they’d given, all he wanted was to keep them safe, to keep his boys  _ safe _ .

_ He was watching Fundy tear down the walls, he watched as Fundy left him behind. _

L’manburg had abandoned him, and he was fine leaving it behind. There was only one thing stopping him.

“How are we going to get L’manburg back?” Tommy and his determination, Tommy and his fire, Tommy who still cared about L’manburg because it was his home.  _ His baby _ . Tommy who still trusted Technoblade, who trusted Tubbo, who was still so innocent despite everything he’d gone through. Wilbur knew that Tommy would fight for L’manburg, no matter what.

_ "Do I shoot him Wil, or do I aim for the skies?" _

Even if it killed him, Wilbur refused to let it happen again. 

Wilbur knew that he was losing it, that he wasn’t sane anymore. He felt it with the same clarity he had when he realized Phil wasn’t coming back, and that Tommy was his responsibility. He realized it when he hit Tommy for the first time and the younger had left. 

He couldn’t hold onto L’manburg anymore not if he wanted to stay, now only if Tommy could  _ see _ that.

_ “Look, our nation's gone. Our nation's far behind us, Tommy. Let's blow that motherfucker to smithereens. Let's blow the whole thing up! I say, if we can't have Manberg, then NO ONE - NO ONE CAN HAVE MANBERG!" _

_ “Have you not noticed?! Everyone who's claiming to be on our side, they're lying to us! Tubbo?! He's lying to you, man! He- He would drop us at the SECOND he realizes we're not in the lead anymore!” _

_ “I know you're scared, Tommy, I understand you're scared. And it's scary! It's scary, Tommy, but y'know what, in a time like this, when a man has nothing to lose, d'y'know what that means? It means we can do what we want.” _

_ They had won _ , Wilbur dimly realized as he stood over Schlatt’s body,  _ they’d won _ . He watched as everyone rejoiced and he watched as Tommy gave up his presidency. It was then that he realized that maybe he wasn’t needed at all, maybe Tommy didn’t need him anymore. Maybe it was time to let it all go for once.

He pressed the button and watched it all fall down from Phil’s arms.

  
  


The afterlife, Wilbur soon realized, was not what it should’ve been. There were no Angel choirs, no pearly gates, no god or devil nor Heaven or Hell. There was just emptiness and regret. The grass under his feet felt fake and looked wrong, too healthy for its own good and too perfect. The sky was always clear and the sun was always bright, and there was no night since it wasn’t needed. It took everything Wilbur had in him not to kill Schlatt with his own two hands while he watched the man waste away.

The afterlife felt like the cottage, when it was just him left and the cottage was finally empty. He had stood in the living room before he left and listened. There was nothing left there but the ghosts of a life that was left behind and a family that never would be whole again.

It was fine, he said as he watched L’manburg rebuild itself. It was fine, he reassured himself as he watched Tommy cry, as he watched Tommy burn down George’s house. It would be fine, as he watched Dream lead Tommy into exile.

But it wasn’t, it never was. Why did Wilbur ever trust them, he was right never to since all they did was take, take, take and never looked back at what they did. They could never learn because they were all too far in their own heads and too lost to their selfishness, because Phil had left, Technoblade had moved on, Tubbo had adapted and Tommy was left behind. Tommy was always left behind.

_ Wilbur had promised never to leave, and he did. Oh God he left. _

It was Schlatt who first told him something was wrong and Wilbur had ran. He could only watch as Tommy stepped into the prison, as he stepped into the cell, as the TNT was set off and Tommy was trapped. He was trapped and he was with Dream.

“Sam! Sam, this isn’t funny let me out, let me out! PHIL, PHIL.” and then. “WIL, WILBUR, WILBUR PLEASE.”

Wilbur could only scream out in pain as he watched Tommy crumble into the floor. He could only watch as Tommy remained unresponsive and Dream wouldn’t stop talking. He could only watch as Tommy shook in his sleep and Wilbur could no longer hold him, could no longer protect him. He could only watch as Tommy started screaming at Dream and the admin snapped, as Dream hit Tommy across the face and threw him down into the obsidian floor. Tommy’s head hit the wall, again, and again, and again, and again. Until it stopped and Tommy’s head was no more than chunks on the floor of the cell and his blood painted the floor.

_ Was this his punishment, to watch as Tommy had everything taken from him? To watch his little brother get knocked down again and again and until he couldn’t get back up, until he was gone forever never to come back. Dead, dead, dead, Tommy was-- _

There was a quiet sniffle and Wilbur whipped around, daring not to hope. “Wil-- Wil-- Wilby,  _ please _ .” 

Tommy was here, Tommy was  _ dead _ . Wilbur crushed Tommy to his chest and broke down, he didn’t have to hide his tears this time since he knew that Tommy was crying too. “My baby,  _ my baby _ , my poor baby.”

Tommy would be safe now, Wilbur would make sure of it. It didn’t matter if he had to fight god themself or if he had to raze the world until it was nothing but kindling. 

“You were so  _ brave,  _ I’m _so_ proud of you.”

It was him and Tommy against the world, and he wouldn’t lose sight of it again.


End file.
